Mission Monthly – December 2001
“…what really is so terrible about ‘belonging’ to someone who loves you?”
Wendy Shalit, A Return to Modesty
This meditation is dedicated to the memory of the newly departed Archimandrite Fr. John Namie. Fr. John was the first Director of the Antiochian Village Youth Camp; and though a self-proclaimed “camping illiterate” his literacy of love nurtured countless young souls for Christ and quenched the thirst of many (of all ages) parched in the spiritual desert of a world drained of the waters of life.
One of the most impressive gifts of Fr. John’s character was his ability to make decisions. He never seemed to waver even in the most difficult of circumstances, especially when facing one of life’s most painful challenges—a chronic erosion of physical health (which agonizingly stripped this man of his vocation in the active priesthood). Spiritually, however, he remained a giant, never wavering in his love and faith in God, and in thankfulness no matter how heavy a cross he was asked to bear.
In my life Fr. John became, as we will soon hear liturgically in the troparion of St. Nicholas (Dec. 6), “a canon [or standard] of faith” (I wish I would’ve taken the chance to tell him). He is one of a few men whose discernment I would seek and whose words I would trust as being void of self-interest or importance. If it is true that God never allows a man to be tempted beyond his strength then I am not surprised at the authority with which Fr. John manfully bore his cross. He faced the spiritual warfare of his life with the patience of Job, the patristic discipline of Chrysostom and the courage of any of the great martyrs. He probably would be angry with me for these “empty words of praise,” but I write them with love and to the glory which Fr. John brought to God in his life. The Church on earth will miss him. The brotherhood of priests will miss him. I will miss him. May his memory be eternal!
If I were asked what was the “cause” of Fr. John’s strength I would have to answer, the grace of God and his obedience to Christ and to his bishop. More than anything Fr. John was a man who knew his place and knew his name. He was not like the man in James 1:24. When Fr. John turned away from the mirror he never forgot “what he was like.” Most importantly, Fr. John knew that he belonged to something greater than himself. He was once quoted as saying,“Christianity is really life and life is living it with people; and when you do share with people you learn to give of yourself. I don’t know anybody who can fulfill themselves unless they go outside of themselves; because if you’re always looking to fulfill yourself and satisfy your own needs obviously you’ll never do that. But if you’re looking to live and you live for others, your life then really has meaning.”This is so typical of the constant theme of Fr. John’s life and preaching. In comparison to some ways of “modern” thinking Fr. John would be considered a dinosaur. He was not a “free-thinker” and yet his mind and heart discerned a great depth of God’s Wisdom. He was not ambitious for leisure and luxury, or for the freedoms afforded through security in the world, and so he was free from the constraints and consequences of a rebellious and selfish heart.
I would receive e-mails from Fr. John from time to time. He continued to show a sense of spiritual urgency for his children in Christ. Like Fr. John, I believe the crossroads at which we stand today is particularly critical and solemn (and not just because of the times). While man in his pride still does not want to give up the reins of self-direction we as Christians have to face the simple truth St. Paul tried to get through to the Church at Corinth, “You are not your own” (1 Cor. 6:19). What is really so terrible about “belonging” to someone who loves you? God and His Church? Against all “enlightened” thought, scientific reason and simple selfishness Fr. John knew the answer to this question; in fact, he chose it, he lived it and he was blessed!