“At the approach of a great feast you must watch yourself with particular care. The enemy endeavors beforehand to chill your heart towards the subject, the event being celebrated, so that you will not honor it by whole-heartedly considering its reality. He acts upon us through the weather, or through the food and drink that we have taken, or through his own arrows thrown plentifully at the heart and inflaming the entire man, at which time evil, impure and blasphemous thoughts occur to us, and we feel thoroughly averse to the solemnity. We must overcome the enemy by forcing ourselves to meditate and pray devoutly.”

St. John of Kronstadt

Since the fall of Adam the entire creation, and man in particular, has had to fight with great effort to sustain zeal towards
our God and Creator. ” …the kingdom of heaven has suffered violence, and men of violence take it by force” (Matt. 11:12). The
effects of a lukewarm faith and even open rebellion are woven through every generation of man’s experience. The fact that we are
bound to the fallen nature is enough of a “cause” for this sorrowful reality. We are comforted, however, as explained by St.
Herman of Alaska in a letter to one of his spiritual children; “Our sins do not in the least hinder our Christianity… Sin, to
one who loves God, is nothing other than an arrow from the enemy in battle. The true Christian is a warrior fighting his way.”
In other words, because of our nature, it should never surprise us when we “miss the mark.” It is totally necessary for us to be
disappointed and even ashamed of our sins and ready to confess them and repent, but we must never lose confidence in the
fulfilled promise of our God Who, “desires not the death of the sinner, but rather that he should turn again (repent) and live.”
What are we then to do?—in a word, FIGHT!

Virtually every successful sports team will “scout” its opponent before entering into the arena of competition. It is no
different for us as we face our ultimate adversary, the devil. For us not to seek a tactical understanding of how the devil
operates is spiritually defeating! The great author, C.S. Lewis, explored well the devil’s tactics in his popular book, The
Screwtape Letters. One of the most successful tactics used in our contemporary society has been to try to convince the
world that there is no such thing as the devil, or at least that he is merely a horn-headed, pitchfork-carrying “meanie” who is
only there to scare people. This is a deception that has left this world vulnerable and ill-prepared for the very real aspects
of spiritual warfare. Jesus Himself warned us of the certain danger imposed upon us by the evil one, “Do not fear those who kill
the body but cannot kill the soul; rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matt. 10:28).

As we continue our journey and preparations for the Nativity of our Lord, let us be aware of the various subtle and
not-so-subtle demonic tactics that lurk about to disturb our vigilance. If I could point out just one it would be how busy the
world keeps us, and seemingly more so at this time of year. Many have asked, “Why does the Church instruct us to fast during
this joyous season?” I believe the answer is obvious! When we give ourselves away to all the shopping, the parties, the plans,
the foods, what is left to give to God when the day of His glorious birth actually arrives? Is it any wonder that the day after
Christmas is reportedly one of the most depressing of the entire year? For those who have not “spent” their celebrations, the
Orthodox Church teaches us that the celebrations are just beginning! Beloved, remain steadfast and vigilant lest the devil steal
from you the truly blessed joy that awaits us on the day of (and the twelve days of feasting that follow) our Lord’s miraculous
birth!

“To suffer lovingly is to suffer no longer. To flee from the cross is to be crushed beneath its weight. We should pray for a love of the cross, then it will become sweet.” ‘One day’, said Fr. Monnin, ‘I asked Fr. Jean whether his trials ever caused him at any time to lose his interior peace. He replied,’ “What, the cross make us lose our inward peace? Surely it is the cross that bestows [peace] on our hearts. ALL OUR MISERIES COME FROM OUR NOT LOVING IT”

St. Jean Vianney, +1859, a Saint of the Roman Catholic Church

Wouldn’t it be nice if everything in life worked out according to our plans? We seek Christ and live a feast of faith from the harvest of seeds planted in the good soil. We seek marriage and we meet the true mate of our dreams. We take a new job and it lasts to retirement, becoming a source of personal fulfillment and security. Our relationships with our families are never strained, and our companions always admire us and never disturb the blessed unfolding of each new day. There is always plenty of time to attend to our homes, to our hobbies and to rest. The peace that each day brings is only compounded in the peace of yesterday. Wouldn’t it be nice… ?

The facts of this life, however, are substantially different, though I have known people and occasions when the blessed gifts of peace have existed in these important matters of life. But even when there is peace in one’s marriage, job, family, home, is this the type of peace that St. Jean Vianney was speaking about? Was this the abundance of life Jesus promised in saying, “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly” (John 10:10). Not necessarily! If I put my hope and trust in the worldly peace that may come from the mere temporal elements of life, I fear that I may be gravely “missing the mark.”

It is because of our fallen nature that our eyes are veiled to the very realities of the fallen nature. One main “goal” of spiritual warfare and ascetical discipline, and our total and complete submission to it, is to see life as it really is: beautiful but always tainted with the effects of sin and in continual need of the Savior! A real awareness of the fallen nature must be deeply rooted within us, otherwise inevitable trials and suffering will have no meaning and become a cause and source of bitterness towards others and ultimately towards God.

It is up to us, just as it was for all the glorified Saints of the Church, to seek continual entry into the death and resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ, and into the meaning of suffering, both our own and that which is in the world. Once we understand suffering, by the grace of God, and its direct connection to the Cross of Christ, nothing should ever interfere with our desire to rest in the “sweetness” of it.

Many do prefer, however, to blame God or other men for their circumstances, or to take a cynical view of life, even tragically of life in the Church. It makes sense that misery lies in this spirit of blame and cynicism. Contrary to this, there are countless examples in the lives of the Saints who lived in the fullness of joy despite bleak circumstances and violent persecutions. Adam, the first man, failed his “cross” with a yearning towards self-determination. See the misery that accompanied it! In the true spirit of self-examination we must also admit to knowing the weight of this miserable yearning!

There is only one answer to the question of seeking true peace, God’s peace, and escaping the crushing weight of the Cross of Christ; it is by joyfully joining Christ upon it! The life before us is beautiful and guided clearly by the wisdom of the Church. Let us therefore seek to understand and live the words of St. Paul, “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me” (Gal. 2:20), and that we might “know the peace of God, which passes all understanding” (Phil. 4:7).

“As surely as God is faithful, our word to you has not been yes and no. For the Son of God, Jesus Christ, whom we preached among you… was not yes and no; but in Him it is always yes. For all the promises of God find their yes in Him. That is why we utter the Amen through Him, to the glory of God.”

2 Corinthians 1:18-20

This passage from St. Paul’s second letter to the church at Corinth became a strong comfort to me as my life in Christ became increasingly active in my mid-twenties. I was blessed with the opportunity to spend two summers at the Antiochian Village Youth Camp and travel across the nation with the KERYGMA music group, allowing me to make many wonderful friends and acquaintances. At the end of the summer camping season or a concert weekend the inevitable question would be asked, “Will we see you again soon?” I always answered confidently, “Yes, God-willing.”

I love the way St. Paul handled this situation with his beloved Christian family at Corinth. “Was I vacillating when I wanted to [come and visit you but could not]? Do I make my plans like a worldly man, ready to say yes and no at once (2 Cor. 1:17)?” St. Paul wanted to be with his beloved but always knew to wait upon the will of God to see how his life would be directed as plans were made and actual events unfolded. What did St. Paul mean then when he wrote, “but in Him it is always yes”? Does that mean that every time we ask God for something He is going to answer “Yes”? Well… yes! But with the qualifier, “as is according to My will!” This is a crossroads of understanding in our relationship with God; how we perceive Him and expect of Him and, consequently, how we perceive and expect of one another.

Do I trust in God’s activity (economy) in my life? One of the most beautiful prayers of the Church says, “Grant us all our petitions which are unto salvation.” How many of us bring to God in prayer a laundry list of “needs”? How many of us actually know what our “needs” are? Remember the beautiful morning prayer of Metropolitan PHILARET, “O Lord, I know not what to ask of You. You alone know what are my true needs….” When approaching God, what we request and how we respond to His response truly indicates how much we believe and trust in His divine providence and care. His answer will always be “Yes, as is according to My will,” which actually may translate to “No, because it is not for your salvation.”

This understanding is also very important in how we make requests and have expectations of one another, seeing God at work in the midst of our relationships “for our salvation.” St. Paul planned on reuniting with the Corinthians on his way to and from Macedonia, before he returned to Judea. God did not, however, allow this visit to happen and the people were understandably disappointed. St. Paul was not “vacillating” when he told the Corinthians that he was coming for a visit and then did not come. He was sincere in making these plans but it simply was not the will of God.

We know that God is all sincerity and that He is constant in our salvation. In this fallen and imperfect world what more can we do than trust in His providence? What more can we do than sincerely attend to the needs of our families, churches, homes, employment and friendships? There will always be failures on our part and disappointment with others. If we are trusting in His providence, however, there is a greater hope that what ever happens in our life, be it joy or sorrow, health or sickness, satisfaction or disappointment, success or failure, it will be accepted more humbly as the will of God for our life. If we accept it as such we will hear His resounding, “Yes!” and be able to “utter the Amen through Him, to the glory of God.”

“Indeed, [Elijah] was exceedingly perfect, but in his own times, when the mind of men was in some degree childish, and they needed this kind of schooling… nevertheless [the Apostles] have more required of them than [Elijah]“

St. John Chrysostom

As priest and spiritual father I am often asked the question, “What is required of me?” I always try to answer according to the questioner’s level of spiritual, emotional, mental and physical maturity. The Church has always acknowledged the uniqueness of each man’s struggle and the crosses God may be asking him to bear. We can thank God for His abundant sensitivity to the variety of needs unique to each one of His children. We can thank God that what is “required of us” as individuals is exactly what should be required of us for our salvation, nothing more and nothing less.

For this meditation I am more interested in the Church as a whole. In St. John Chrysostom’s commentary on the Transfiguration of our Lord from St. Matthew’s Gospel he compared the requirements of the Apostles to that which was required of Elijah and Moses, not merely as individuals but as individuals within a particular era or time in salvation history. St. John believed that by the time of Christ Israel had made much progress in its “wrestle with God.” Moses lead Israel from slavery to Pharaoh to God’s giving of the Ten Commandments to the edge of the promised land. Elijah lead Israel in the confrontation with Jezebel, the seductive idolatry of the Canaanite religion and the priests of Baal. According to St. John, the Apostles (especially Peter, James and John) were given even greater gifts than Moses and Elijah. They received the fulfillment of the promise in the brilliant light of Tabor; “Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power” (Mark 9:1). The Apostles healed the infirm, raised the dead, witnessed the Resurrection of Christ, received the Holy Spirit at Pentecost and preached the Word of God, for most of them, unto death. Indeed, Israel had progressed and by the time of Christ much more was required of those who followed Him.

We are faced with similar challenges today, the greatest of which have nothing to do with world and domestic peace or economies, job security and retirement planning, home maintenance and family scheduling, health care and personal fitness. Our greatest challenge encompasses all these and more. Our greatest challenge is to discern and fulfill what is required of us in our own era and time in salvation history. We are recipients of an intensely rich spiritual tradition which all too often is left by the wayside of personal opinion and worldly pursuits. Over one hundred years into Orthodoxy’s immigration to this continent and we are still often more concerned about the language of worship than about preaching the Word of God with rightful Apostolic authority to ourselves, our nation and our world in dire need of repentance. Over one hundred years into our immigration and we are still more zealous to maintain the customs of our ethnic cultures than to embrace our American neighbor with a sincere and inviting expression of “koinonia,” the community of the faith. Over one hundred years into our immigration and we are still being seduced by the American dream and its validation to build our bank accounts and indulge in material excess rather than generously sacrificing to build our churches, support our priests, and be full participants in all aspects of faith. After two thousand years of Christianity it is time to realize that much is required of us in our own era and, like Moses and Elijah, the Apostles and holy fathers, and especially our most recent Saints, empty ourselves to the calling of a disciple sent to live and proclaim the Good News to the time and place to which we’ve been given.

“When Christ calls a man He bids him, ‘come and die’.”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

A few weeks ago Public Broadcast Television aired an original movie on the life of the famous German Lutheran pastor and scholar, Dietrich Bonhoeffer. This was not my first encounter with the life and death of this 20th century Christian martyr who gave his life defending the Christian faith along with other German faithful, against Adolf Hitler’s Third Reich.My first encounter was through Steven CurtisChapman’s inspired Christian music album entitled, “For the Sake of the Call” based on Bonhoeffer’s book, ‘The Cost of Discipleship.” My second encounter was when I read Bonhoeffer’s captivating book for myself.

Dr. Bonhoeffer was in America in 1939 while his Germany increasingly fell under the brutal control of National Socialism (Nazism). Hitler’s rise to power and attempts to control the conscience of the German people was beyond “a great concern” for Bonhoeffer. Without regret he decided to return to his oppressed and persecuted fellow Christians at a time when they needed him most. Bonhoeffer wrote in a private letter, “Ishall have no right to participate in the reconstruction of Christian life after the war if I do not share in the trials of this time with my people….” Later he wrote from prison, “I am sure of God’s hand and guidance… You must never doubt that I am thankful and glad to go the way which I am being led. My past life is abundantly full of God’s mercy, and above all sin stands the forgiving love of the Crucified [One].”Soon after his return to Germany Bonhoeffer was indeed arrested and imprisoned for treason, painfully interrogated and tragically hung on April 9th, 1945, days before his prison was liberated by Allied forces.

Many have debated whether Bonhoeffer’s death was a necessary one. His voluntary choice to return to Germany, knowing with relative certainty the consequences, opens wide the door of discussion on what it means to die for Christ. Bonhoeffer’s choice may very well have equaled our Mission’s patron, St. Ignatius of Antioch,as he faced the “Caesar” of his own day. How many of us will ever be faced with the possibility of literally shedding our blood for Christ? How many ways are there for me to understand these words of Jesus, “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13)?

Often overshadowed by the glories and drama of Christian martyrdom are the simple ways in which I can “lay down my life” each day. How many times each day do I have the opportunity to “set aside” my own needs, wants, desires and opinions in order to care for those of others; in order to pray, to fast, to liturgize, and to care for the poor and needy and fulfill my life in Christ as a true and obedient disciple. As Bonhoeffer’s book title affirms, there is a cost to being a disciple of Jesus Christ; that cost is the giving of one’s life completely to witnessing to the fullness of our life in Christ! Each day brings a multitude of ways for me to die to myself, though I can only hope that God may grant me the eyes to see and the will to act. This, beloved, is indeed our first calling as disciples of Christ May we respond unselfishly, in body and soul alike, that each daily death may truly prepare us to courageously face all challenges and persecutions. And so when this life is ended, be it a painless, blameless and peaceful death or one forced upon us in defense of our Lord Jesus Christ, our faith and hope in God’s promise and the Resurrection of Christ will be our witness unto life eternal and to the glory of God’s Holy Name. “What kind of joy is this that counts it a blessing to suffer? What kind of joy is this that gives the prisoner his song? What kind of joy could stare death in the face and see it as sweet victory? This is the joy of a soul that’s forgiven arid free” (Steven Curtis Chapman).