“Each one of us here today will at one time in our lives look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question, “We are willing to help, Lord, but what, if anything, is needed?” For it is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don’t know what part of ourselves to give or more often than not the part we have to give is not wanted. And so it is those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them. We can love completely without complete understanding.

“A River Runs Through It”

I will never forget the powerful and poignant conclusion to the movie, “A River Runs Through It.” The father of the main character, a Presbyterian minister, in one of his final sermons exposes his painful struggle to understand the disrespectful and self-destructive lifestyle of his youngest son.

Two points come to mind as I consider this bittersweet tale. First, the unyielding spiritual warfare against our fallen and frail nature and its struggle to resist sin even in the face of certain destruction of dignity, conscience or even life itself (not to mention our eternal salvation). Secondly, how love, godly and unconditional, when poured out upon even the most hopeless of situations produces gifts of peace, freedom and the ability to keep giving beyond all measure of strength, calling to mind the infamous saying, “Love is the only treasure that increases the more we give it away.”

Set in pristine Montana in the early twentieth century, this story naturally evokes images of paradise: majestic mountains, pure rivers, endless miles of virgin forest… the “Big Sky.” “O Lord, how manifold are Thy works! In wisdom hast Thou made them all…” (Psalm 104). One could imagine this “paradise” to be unscarred by the decay and sorrow of sin but, alas, death reigned here too and all of the attractions to it.

What comfort could we offer this father who loved his son, calling him “a beautiful boy?” I grieved for the anguish of this bewildered parent, especially seeing him search his heart for a response in the face of his own temptations to despair or become disillusioned. His words reveal a man who has truly sought a godly response to this very real family tragedy.

“Glory to You, curing hardships and losses with the healing course of time” (the Akathist of Thanksgiving). Time indeed is precious as we seek the Lord and His gifts of grace in the midst of our sorrows and joys. My pursuit of Him has caused me from time to time to wonder about the “sentiment” God may have toward the condition of His creation. This story has prompted in me thoughts of God and His disobedient children; those of us who, even after all that God has done for us, still “love darkness rather than light” (John 3:19). The father in our story encountered rejection and helplessness. Our Heavenly Father has certainly known rejection since the fatal fall of Adam. The difference here is that God knows no helplessness but only pure love and true patience. He is the One who, through all our mistakes, loves completely and, as the One who understands, gives us the grace to do the same.

As in all seasons, this great season of preparation for the Nativity of Christ is a time for repentance and a time to remember that God loves and came to save each one of us, both the strong and the weak. We must continually ask God, “Grant me to see my own transgressions and not to judge my brother.” We must courageously face the inevitable times of difficulty in all relationships, ever aware of the presence of Christ in the midst of our struggles.

In the Incarnation God became our indiscriminate Co-Sufferer and has shown us the true meaning of life and long-suffering, “count the forbearance of our Lord as salvation” (2 Peter 3:15). If we believe that Christ is our salvation, “loving us more than we know how to love,” then our response can only be to “love completely.” Only then will we discover, by God’s grace, that loving completely is all that we ever need to understand.

“His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness… that through these you may escape from the corruption that is in the world because of passion, and become partakers of divine nature. For this very reason make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these things are yours and abound, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For whoever lacks these things is blind and shortsighted and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins. Therefore, brethren, be more zealous to confirm your call and election, for if you do this you will never fall; so there will be richly provided for you an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.”

2 Peter 1:3-11

This passage is by far one of my most favorite in the New Testament. It embodies most of what we believe as Orthodox Christians to be essential to our faith; for what more could we ever hope, pray or work for than, “an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ?”

It is often hard to believe (so maybe we’d better just trust!) that God has given us ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING necessary for our salvation. Knowledge of Himself, fulfillment of His promise, escape from passion and corruption and the gift of becoming partakers of His divine nature. This last difficult theme is heard again and again in the voice of the Fathers of the Church, “Becoming by grace what God is by nature.” The term for this is “theosis” and is “[the] perfection given by the grace of God [only] to the degree in which man himself, freely and personally, seeks union with Christ in the Holy Spirit” (Fr. John Meyendorff, The Byzantine Legacy of the Orthodox Church).

When I look into the depths of my own heart and life, knowing the gifts of God that potentiallyawait me, I have to ask myself this arresting question: What is it that often prevents me from simply remembering and acting upon God’s great and holy gifts? In the famous book, The Way of the Pilgrim, a section called “A Confession Which Leads the Inward Man to Humility” reads, “For if I loved God I should be continually thinking about Him with heartfelt joy. Every thought of God would give me gladness and delight. On the contrary, I much more often and much more eagerly think about earthly things, and thinking about God is labor and dryness.” The answer, therefore, must simply be that I do not love God and am not truly thankful! Back in my KERYGMA days I wrote a song entitled, “How Many Times.” This song was inspired by James 2:23-24. I wrote, “Yes, it happened again, another fateful day; like a ship out on the ocean tossed about by the waves. Like the man in the mirror I often turn away, only to forget the image of my face.” I can only thank God for the inspiring sorrow of failure!

Contemplating the authority of God’s power we discover the simple mystery of unconditional love. Many try to practice this virtue. Many (though probably not enough) receive this blessed gift from family and friends. I know that I have been blessed by this and have tried to practice it. I also know, however, that as in all things our efforts pale in comparison to the Unconditional Love of God. He is our absolute prototype and the unconditional love and forgiveness He extends to us is so real, so deep, so complete that we can only dare to say that we perceive it. What can we do then to not forget His great love and forgiveness? First we must truly yearn to “escape from the corruption that is in the world.” Secondly we must believe that the standards God has set for His children are truly for our sake and for our single-minded pursuit. Finally, we must heed the words of St. Paul, “for whatever does not proceed from faith is sin” (Rom. 14:23). In other words, we must with certainty and zeal pursue faith and virtue; but we must do so only and always in the Name of Jesus.

It is a terrible tragedy to be spiritually blind, shortsighted and forgetful. We are all guilty of this offense! Still, no matter how many times we forget, we are forgiven; no matter how many times we forget, we must repent and return. I am stirred by God’s forgiveness because I know that I am completely unworthy. May He one day grant me the wisdom to see clearly and faithfully the distant day of judgment in His Kingdom revealed today. May He grant me to continually remember how much I am forgiven that I might, in the Name of Jesus, enter the life of virtue and simply be a witness to grace and holiness. And for all of us may He grant us a good start each and every day… especially today as we approach the season of our Lord’s Nativity and prepare to celebrate all of its wonders and possibilities!

“Poor mothers,” thought he. “There is one thing sadder than to see their children die—to see them live evil lives.”

Victor Hugo, Les Miserables

I do not know nor can I possibly imagine a parent’s anguish caused by the death of a child. I’ve known several parents who have survived the death of one of their children and whether the child was an infant or a retiree and the parents young or entering the twilight of their own lives, the tragedy of the child’s death always left a surging wake of broken hearts assaulting the very ramparts of one’s faith and strength.

My peripheral experience of this type of sorrow does not, however, deprive me of empathy (indeed, I have lost a parent and others very close to me). Knowing the sorrow of death, and indirectly the death of a child, I approach this subject with great tenderness.

The much heralded story “Les Miserables” was written and set in early to middle 19^thcentury France. Anyone who reads is aware that “classic” literature often provides excellent social commentary and, according to the Fathers, it engages and exercises the soul Godward. The presence of God is more than obvious in this story and must propel before even the narrowest of visions the glaring use of the word “evil.” It certainly grabbed my attention and left me wondering about our era relative to “evil” as an acknowledged reality. The possibilities are frightening, not so much in the presence of evil but rather that we actually might not see it! Author M. Scott Peck wrote in his book, The People of the Lie, “I can think of nothing that would fill Satan with greater glee… than an attitude on the part of humans that it is impossible to identify evil.”

A topic this large hardly lends itself to a brief meditation but its significance certainly is worthy of an introduction. The growing social and media trend to portray immorality as “normal” relativizes evil as dangerously as it does Truth. This should weigh heavily upon our hearts, especially regarding its affect on the spiritual and moral development of our youth. As a person working in a public high school I am exposed to teenage rituals on a daily basis. I will spare my readers the graphic details, but I wonder how many parents are aware of the growth in cynicism, disrespect, anger, violence, self-indulgence, immodesty, sexual promiscuity and lack of direction and purpose in this population? I think many would be shocked!

It is not my goal here to reproach our youth, rather my desire is to protect them by focusing the Light of Christ upon an amoral world, forcing both children and adults alike into the spotlight of accountability. What are we doing as priests, parents, god-parents and teachers to help our children awaken to the Love and calling of God and to direct their spiritual gifts towards God as they are revealed? Our modern society is so riveted on “success, security, and schedules,” that many are left cold and rootless, seeking any sense of feeling, sifting through a myriad of mixed messages to fill the void of missing Love and Truth in their lives. M. Scott Peck went further to define evil simply as, “the absence of Truth.” This is a very subtle reality which demands much more than just a casual glance into our heart to see how selectively one can be when rationalizing compromise on matters of good conscience. It also helps me to better understand the quote from Les Miserables; it may be easier to endure the death of a child then if he were to turn to evil, because then we must fear even more for his salvation as well as for our own.

“We don’t know why but when the world is lost in shadows there is a light that will remain. The love He gave, that cared enough to die, is as endless as the Montana sky.”

“Montana Sky”, Whiteheart

It has been many years since I first heard the song “Montana Sky” by the popular Contemporary Christian music group, Whiteheart. I was first drawnto this work through its ethereal sound; I was further inspired by its lyrical imagery. In my view the “endless” presence and love of God in all of creation can never be overstated; its expression only limited by our inability to comprehend the infinite height, width, depth and breadth of God’s eternal Being and Wisdom. The Anaphora prayer of the Orthodox Church’s Divine Liturgy candidly portrays its own prayerful imagery declaring God’s inexpressible nature, “for thou art God ineffable, inconceivable, invisible, incomprehensible…” Yes, we confess that the eternal essence of God is unknowable to our created nature; while at the same time we, as “the one(s) who adore” (Fr. Alexander Schmemann, For the Life of the World, p. 15), are compelled, often using the nature of creation, to attempt to express it.

Having just returned from the “Big Sky” state of Montana and the Northern Rocky Mountains of Glacier National Park, I cannot help but joyfully reflect upon the beauty and significance of God’s creation. Creation is beautiful because God Himself IS Beauty (God may have even increased the beauty of His creation so that through it the indelible image of Himself given to each person by right of their birth might resonate and be drawn into contemplation of their Creator). Is it coincidence or providence which gives so much variety of color, scent, species and size? Khouriya Vanessa commented to me while passing through the shadows of nine and ten thousand foot, jagged-edged, snow-capped mountain tops, “I wonder how anyone could deny God after seeing such beauty!” I was deeply moved upon overhearing the conversation of a father speaking tenderly to his young son, “…and when you look into the horizon you can see the glory of God’s Kingdom.” In one impressive moment, that many parents only dream of, a father and son together experienced the awesome power of God in His creation and offered thanksgiving and praise to Him for His great and wonderful gifts.

Many have tried to capture this beauty in words. I have experienced little to match the poignant Akathist of Thanksgivingwritten by the Archpriest Gregory Petroff, +1940, “Lord, how good it is to be your guest; the delicately scented wind, the mountains stretching to the sky, the waters reflecting like infinite mirrors, the golden rays of sun, theairiness of clouds. All nature secretly whispers, full of tenderness, and even the birds and beasts bear the mark of your Love. Blessed is mother earth with her transient beauty, longing for the homeland which eternal and where in imperishable beauty rings out: Alleluia!”(Kontakion 2). I am content, however, to remain silent in my musings lest I become cliche in an all too common attempt to express the inexpressible. I am content to allow God’s grace to draw me into a deeper contemplation and recognition of the miracle of life, His Life, expressed in the glorious beauty of creation!

“Take heed to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God.”

Acts 20:28

It seems appropriate that I reflect this month on the theme of this year’s Antiochian Archdiocese Clergy Symposium. In many ways it was a hard-hitting conference. Primarily we as clergy were reminded again and again of the enormous responsibility given and received in our ordination to serve the Altar and the people of Christ.

We were encouraged to take special care of ourselves. Highlighted was the well known advice of the great saint, Seraphim of Sarov, “Save yourself and a thousand souls will be saved around you.” I recall a recent conversation with a parishioner encouraging me in the simple matter of making “quality” time for my wife and family. Her comments ended by saying, “the health of our parish is dependent upon the health (spiritual, emotional, physical) of our priest.” This theme was echoed many times throughout the conference, both in the presentations and in the private conversations amongst the men. With all the attention given to this matter I cannot help but believe that this is a real problem of the priesthood. My sympathy especially goes out to those men who are serving parishes with membership exceeding three, four and five hundred families. Time management and task prioritization seem inadequate tools when one is juggling personal prayer and study, liturgy and divine services, sacramental ministration, pastoral counseling, parish administration, family and personal time (with, unfortunately, the latter always seeming to come up last).

Secondly, the demands of caring for the flock take on an intricate life of their own when one considers the challenges associated with balancing the life of the Church with person, personality and personal circumstance. Certain questions were asked for which there was no answer. I can only conclude that maybe some of these questions just can’t be answered. I will spare the reader the inner workings of the pastor’s mind, yet one must know this truth: in the pastoral ministry there is very little (if any) black and white. The truth of the matter is that there are no pastoral absolutes and the mark of a good pastor is his ability to minister in life’s many hues of gray.

I was deeply touched in the reaffirmation of how sincerely the bishops and priests love and care for the people. I pray that the laity will come to a deeper and abiding knowledge and trust in this very fact. I do believe (for the most part) that this is the case and I also believe that it can only be sin and the efforts of the devil which interfere with the relationship between clergy and laity and which sometimes prevents us from realizing the true, common work of the Church. Our Church is hierarchical but not papal, and our Church is dependent upon the laity but it is not congregational. This conciliar or cooperative nature is of the Church’s essence and for our salvation. The clergy are chosen and ordained to serve the people to shouts of “AXIOS!” (He is worthy!); while all are elevated to the royal priesthood by the rite of one’s baptism to the shouts of “SEALED!” (the gift of the Holy Spirit in holy chrismation).

As in most aspects of the inner life, Truth is affirmed and struggle supported only when the Light of Christ is allowed to shine upon the heights and depths of one’s heart and soul. It is an awesome responsibility to be made “overseer” of anything, especially the Church of God. The priest’s role of virtue, leading others to the life of virtues, is empowered by the Holy Spirit in the interior life and expressed in the work of ordination; but it is not a role reserved only for the ordained. A priest will indeed “take heed to himself and to all the flock,” but only the encouragement and support of the flock, energized and hungry for the Word of God and the life of the Church, will complete the cycle.